Friday, March 22, 2013

new every morning




the kids were finally asleep, i walked downstairs listing in my head all of the things i had to get done before tomorrow came... tomorrow. ugh another day. this thought stilled me. dreading tomorrow before it even arrived? this is NOT me, looking to tomorrow with haste and worry. i laid my head down and sat quiet with my eyes shut. shut so tight -- like a little kid who didn't want to see something scary. i didn't want to open them back up and be stuck in that day. that day where i felt nothing but frustration. i put the kids to bed with frustration. if you have ever been there,  and ended the day that way you know how much you hurt once they are asleep. how you wish you could wake them up to apologize. and take it all back. there wasn't anything big that had happened. it was just small things. constant small things. the worst part was i hated how i reacted to stupid tiny moments. each of those tiny battles pulled me down further. by the end of the day i felt defeated. i felt worn. and i felt hopeless. but then a still small voice spoke to me... i love when God reaches you in a moment where you are ready to listen. He said "My mercies are new every morning." i listened and i heard. the tears peaked out of my tightly clenched eyes. and it repeated, every morning! that tiny reminder was all i needed. tomorrow was going to be a new day and a fresh start. i hadn't been mean to my kids, but i hadn't been my loving-self either.  but just like He promised His mercies are new EVERY morning. every day is a new chance to start over and seek Him. to look to Him for mercy. my kids woke up with love and tenderness. as if the day before never occurred. kids are beautiful that way. they understand every day is new. God wanted to remind me i am not perfect, it is ok to need a fresh start. and to Him we are beautiful in our weakness. we need Him every day, and He is always ready and waiting to renew our souls and our minds. not just once in a while, but every day. and i could not make it without Him.




8 comments:

carrie beth said...

Beautiful words. Thank you :)

ruffledsnob said...

Carrie Beth, thank you!! xx

AprilChanel said...

Beautiful.

Elizabeth Lenox said...

Ahh I needed that. I've been there so many times lately too.

ruffledsnob said...

Thank you!! Love you girl! X

ruffledsnob said...

Thanks Elizabeth Lenox, for me writing about it helps remind me that I am not always alone!

chelsea137 said...

As I just laid my 2 year old son down and wanted to cry because it was such a stressful day baby boy #2 in my belly reminded me of this such thing! Thanks, needed this post! Rest up and you'll make it, we all will:)

ruffledsnob said...

Aw you're sooo sweet and thank you!! We will make it!!!! xx